How it all began: 31/12/09 -

So here it is my narcassistic page of golden syrup on toast and there you are the faceless crown i'm telling my tale to, gratis therapy of the 21st century....

You my lil blogger friends are invited along for the ride but i'm warning you now, it ain't going to be easy as we both know its not like it is in the movies... this is going to be one gnaryly self absorbed, rocky road and you'll need to pull your socks up if you are going to keep up!





Wednesday 21 July 2010

The Cove

Those of you who have been reading my blog will know that i'm not an activist and nor do I spend my weekends forming human picket fence for any causes in fact the only thing I've proactively been involved in to date was the G8 summit event in Edinburgh.  Until now...

I watched a documentary called The Cove last night and it disturbed me so much that I actually sent links to my friends to watch it and sign a virtual petition by the organisers.  I was horrified by what I was watching and yet felt it would be wrong to turn it off.

Anyway I'm sharing it with you now and I emplore you to watch this short clip if nothing else (the full film is accessable through the cove website) and to sign the petition.

Here is the video: 


Don't worry I've not gone all moralistic in my approach to blogging and although there are 101 things out there I would change this seems so small in comparision but then why is it still happening.  Some of us on this planet have a lot to answer for!.


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Michael Jackson - Man in the Mirror
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iym7xO3-dz4

Tuesday 20 July 2010

Edge

Do you ever feel like you are on the edge of something or at a point in your life where despite seeming like any other day you feel you are somewhere you need to be careful, watch your step and the changes you make in the near future will somehow affect you the rest of your life...?



Work is insane at the moment as it is IPR time and everything is all change.  I'm also amid compiling several gross misconduct files for the new guys in my team who seem to have fallen under the radar until now so its all go go go! At home despite not seeing my flatmate on her own for about 2 months or at the flat for over a week and yet she has said she wants to 'talk' and could she come home at the weekend when i'm not pulling 12hr shifts to do this?... no, she has to want to do it when i'm coming home shattered and am likely to either cry or throw something at her face... and thats only if she asks me if I want a cup of tea ;s

I'm still seriously crushing on DeLongue but think I was right to be hesitant as I now think i'm getting the friend vibe from him now rather than anything else.  To be honest thats cool too as he is definately 'my kind of people' so hopefully we will end up hanging out and he can introduce me to some of the people in this city I seem to have trouble meeting - those with the same outlook/tastes as me.

Balloo seems pretty interested in where I am going to take things with DeLongue and seems to ask me about it almost every day encouraging me to pursue things when I tell him I think its best not to.  I'm not sure if he has an ulterior motive to be honest, he seems very all over it... its almost pressurising.

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Green Day - Good Riddance

Wednesday 14 July 2010

Gaydar


Gaydar (N): The ability/gift of being able to detect homosexuality in other people.

I'm usually pretty good at playing the sexual preference game, I think it has a little to do with the fact i'm bi, and a lot to do with the fact I find it rather easy to relate to and empathise with people so reading them for my old line of work was breeze.  However, my gaydar was well and truly in question yesterday when it was suggested to me by two seperate people that DeLongue might indeed swing for the other team.

Things with DeLongue are still pretty cute at work, as he's new he needs help from time to time so he pops over a couple of times a shift bypassing 5/6 managers along the way to ask me a question and then usually sends me a quirky email or two and vica versa but even sherlock holmes would struggle to work out the intentions of them as its all sofltly-softly, safely-safe.  Great if it turns out we both like each other and are trying to gague it... embarassing if i'm misreading things but fun all the same.

Anyway with two people mentioning it I started to wonder as his fb profile stated 'single' not what he was into or who he was looking for as lets face it, its not a dating site (yes, i know that is a matter of oppinion).  He wandered over at the end of his shift last night to say hi and we had a conversation on the way out the building and he is soooooo yummy!  Needless to say I decided if nothing else I needed to make sure my gaydar wasn't on the blink and he wasn't gay.

I headed out for coffee with my american friend from work last night (lets call her Holmes - you will see why).  I asked her if she thought he was gay (she thinks he looks like clark kent), and she didn't think so but said she couldn't be sure.  As soon as I got home there was a msg waiting for me - Holmes had been online, found him from my page and had not only scrolled the minimal info she could see about him but had managed to look up the girl from the photo's and do some detective 101 work on her too.  It turns out the girl from the photo's is 99% a lesbian (no competition - hurrah), and DeLongue is most definately straight - his profile now says 'women' - Whoop!

You have to wonder though... how easy would stalking someone be if you actually knew what you were doing on the internet! Scary.

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Electric Six - Gaybar

Sunday 11 July 2010

Butterflies

I met Red last night for the first time in a long time... We kinda fell apart this last little while with work/uni commitments.

It was great to catch up, she has been seeing a guy with a long term bf which is a messed up situ to be in.  Apparently they decided to end it last week and i'm hoping thats how it goes but you never know with things like this - they can get so messy!

We went to see Eclipse at the cinema and how wrong is it that we were both lusting after the 18yr old Jacob Black but mmmm lush!  Then we headed for dinner and drinks at my local(ish) bar. I was in bed tucked up by 1am having recieved texts from 3 different guys I know asking me out on a date - hmmmm I think not! 

Haven't you heard boys... I'm saving myself for the guy who is giving me butterflies in my tummy... Mr DeLonge ;o)

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A song guaranteed to cheer up your Sunday: 
The Clapping Song - Mash-up

Thursday 8 July 2010

Crush

Well its finally happened!  I've got a crush... yes a schoolgirl(ish) crush.

Someone I think is gorgeous, hot, lush - Get in!  Its been too long!!

He's a guy from a team in work, just an advisor on the phone, no high flying business guy, no up his own ass money chasing machine just a guy who has finished Uni and has got a job in a call centre until he can find a job just right for him - and all I have to say is YUM!

He started in a team next to mine working under a manager I get along with and we have spoken pretty much every day since.  He has a gorgeous eyes and a smile that just oozes with mischief.  He makes a point of waiting back after his shift if I'm talking or helping someone to say night and I make a point of saying hi to him when I start mine.  We are definately playing the innocent flirting game trying to suss each other out at the moment.

I know he is single as we've become friends on facebook, but there is a girl in quite a few of his photographs from nights out and holidays that he was either once in a relationship with, wants to be in a relationship with or is just one a really close friend.  Either way, its something I am conscious of.

His manager and I were talking about organising a night out with both our teams so I imagine that will be the teller but for right now i'm just loving the fact I have a crush, someone who catches my eye and makes my tummy flutter... Its like being 13 all over again and Its awesome.  Oh and i'm going to call him DeLongue as he is a little like Tom DeLongue.

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Highly appropriate blast from the past:  Jennifer Paige - Crush

Monday 5 July 2010

Liar, Liar

Friedrich Nietzche once said:

“I'm not upset that you lied to me, I'm upset that from now on I can't believe you”

How true that is.

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Billy Talent - Lies
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pQnNHG-F_Rk