How it all began: 31/12/09 -

So here it is my narcassistic page of golden syrup on toast and there you are the faceless crown i'm telling my tale to, gratis therapy of the 21st century....

You my lil blogger friends are invited along for the ride but i'm warning you now, it ain't going to be easy as we both know its not like it is in the movies... this is going to be one gnaryly self absorbed, rocky road and you'll need to pull your socks up if you are going to keep up!





Thursday 7 October 2010

School Playground

When I got to work last night it became apparent that pretty much every female was either going to go for the Brittney Spears 'hit me baby one more time' look at the school disco or the classic white shirt, black skirt combo (with the exception of one of the bosses who went all out as a saucy matron and stole the show) so I decided to have a rethink.

I ended up going in a purple/blue/pink mini kilt, a blue jumper, a pink tie, some glasses frames with plasters holding the side together and two incredibly squint bunches - thats right... I was a school geek.  I think it worked pretty well and the bonus was that I could be easily spotted in the crowd. 

As you would expect in the playground - there were cliques. Many of the managers were sat together and were pretty much bitching and giggling amid trying to prove who was hotter in their identical costumes.  The guys from the downstairs department and the guys from the upstairs department didn't mix and my geek crew... well we tanked the bar and worked the room.  My boss was there among the first group, she didn't seem overly pleased to see me - I think I have made a bit of a name for myself as an awkward character and so no-one really knows what to do with me.  (Awkward being that if I am forced to work under an idiot, I will push back when things are in total chaos when others just opt for the 'yes sir, yes ma'am approach).

Santa Cruz ended up coming to the event with me as Six was running late from an appointment in another city... I ended up leaving as soon as she said she was on her way as Santa Cruz had well and truly taken the soul out of the party for me.  She took drinks from numerous people including myself and didn't once offer to buy anything back.  She used my bag as a hold all for her camera (which in itself is ok), however when people wanted a photo taking she let any Tom, Dick or Harry go in to get it out when I wasn't watching.  But the icing on the cake was spilling 1/3 of a full pint down my top, not apologising and then rather than getting me a napkin... spraying what can only be described as 'granny perfume' on top of it despite my protests.  I stank, my perfume, beer and granny perfume = horrible.  I went home before anyone thought I was a drunken B.O brewery girl in my spare time.  I spoke with Six on the phone as I was leaving to make sure she was on her way and made it exceptionally clear that asking me to look after her friend and then not turning up for 4hrs was nothing short of taking the piss.

There were no hot guys to report of i'm afraid, however I did get asked out to a date by two guys out of the blue via text last night - and I know what you are thinking but no, I didn't drunken text them 1st, they both independantly, for some reason, decided to text me on a Wednesday night to ask me... Needless to say if you have to ask via text... the answer is pretty obvious... NEXT!

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They didn't play this song at school disco... but they should have!
Hanson - MMmmbop


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